Mates, Mating And Misunderstandings
by RosesAndRavens
Summary: An average day in Fairy Tail...Natsu and Happy eating, Lucy upset with them...wait, what? Levy smells like who? What the heck is mating?


**Disclaimer: **Fairy Tail doesn't belong to me! Or the idea, no this is rather cliche.

**Pairings:** NaLu and GaLe.

**Author's Notes:** As much as I love the stupid idea of mates, it isn't going to be canon. Period. So, this results on me not talking it seriously. Then again, it's only semi-serious.

**A/N Plus: **This story has been edited, changed and made to be less confusing.

* * *

_At Fairy Tail, Natsu, Happy and Lucy were all enjoying breakfast at the bar._

_Well, mostly Natsu and Happy...Lucy was complaining about the state of her kitchen. Somedays, the three of them would be having breakfast at Lucy's house...but Natsu and Happy ("It was all Natsu's idea, Lucy!"-"Happy...you little traitor!") decided to surprise Lucy with cooking. Unless you haven't figured out that her kitchen is burnt down, covered in ashes...then you probably are hopeless._

_Now, on a typical day like this, Levy would come ask her how her novel was going. As usual, Lucy would reply with a "I just finished another chapter" and life would go on like usual. This time, not so much..._

"Ew, Levy, you stink."

"NATSU! That isn't nice! Apologize to Levy!"

"Why? She does!"

"Nat-"

"Oh, wait...I see. Lucy, you weirdo."

"I AM NOT WEIRD!"

"Natsu's right Lucy, your weird."

"Yep, especially if you like the smell of Metal-Head on Levy."

"Natsu, I can't smell her like you. Dragon-slaying senses are different then normal, remember?"

"Oh. So none of you can smell the fact they mated?"

Awkward silence. Poor Happy's fish fell onto the floor.

"MY FISH!"

_Que chaos. Please bare with them as the conversation goes haywire._

"Congrations, Levy, I sugguest we party for our innocent little girl becoming a woman! Pass the liquor!"

"It's too early in the morning for that Cana!"

"Levy, I need details. Now!"

"NOOOO...OUR LEVY-CHAN HAS BEEN DEFILED!"

"It's never too early to drink booze!"

"M-m-mated? As i-i-in s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-"

_Erza's brain goes into hyper-mega pervert mode, and promptly faints._

"We lost Erza!"

"Mira-nee, that's personal information."

"Juvia is so happy! She has one less love-rival now!"

_Juvia promptly latches onto a unknowing Gray._

"Natsu, as I said, any none dragon-slayer can't smell people like you can. Go apologize to Levy for telling everyone her personal information!"

"Why? It's not like the whole guild doesn't already know?"

_Lucy, or in this case "Erza Version Two" is seen slowly torturing Natsu Dragoneel to death...lecturing his badly beaten up body. _

"Tell me Levy, how did he not break your body?"

"C-Cana! It's not like that! Your getting the wrong idea!"

"Sure I am. I have Natsu as proof!"

"No, your mistaken! He didn't mean what you think we did!"

"Then prove it. Oh wait, you can't because you did it with him."

"Gajeel! Lily! Come over here!"

_Conveniently for Levy, Gajeel Redfox and his partner Lily came in from their daily morning training. On the other-hand, everyone who got the wrong idea was looking at this scene expectantly. At this moment, Levy realized she might hurt Gajeel's ego...she had to approach this subject carefully. _

"What do you want, squirt?"

"Can you please tell, well...everyone, why I smell like you?"

"Gihihi, that's easy. We mated."

"KYA! B-B-Babies! So many cute babies!"

_MiraJane down from over imagining babies. The Metal-Headed-Idiot and his flying cat made their way to the guild board, leaving a frustrated Levy. Why does she have to __realize that Gajeel is also an idiot now, of all times? How in Mavis's name would she prove that she is still maintain her image? Wait, image...Lucy...oh, Natsu! How can she forget the basic rule of proving oneself innocent?_

"Lu-chan?"

"Yes, Levy?"

"Can I please borrow Natsu?"

"Sure...?"

_The oblivious girl moves out of the way so the manipulative girl can go to the unconscious boy. Once Natsu was in Levy's hand, she slapped him silly to wake up. I would mention that this caused the rest of the guild to question the blue-haired shortie in question, but then again, that's not important._

"W-what? Lucy! I didn't do it!"

"Natsu, can you please tell the guild what you meant by mating?"

"Doesn't everyone already know what it is?"

"ANSWER ME!"

_Levy, or "Erza Version Three", manages to scare Natsu. Not that he would admit that. _

"Alright, alright..geez. Um, it means that he claimed you?"

_Please note, Erza doesn't stay down for long. _

"C-c-claimed her? As in a w-w-wife? Without my permission? How dare he!"

"Erza, claim down and let the boy explain. We need the answers to know who won the bet."

"Yes Master."

"M-Master!"

"Anyway, yeah, I guess you can call it a wife."

"Natsu, then why did you call it mating?"

"L-Lucy! Ah, um..."

_Natsu, who forgot Lucy was next to him due to being scared of Levy and her glare..then Erza and her aura, suddenly notices her presence. _

"Lu-chan? I thought I gave you a book on dragon-slaying customs?"

"There's a book?!"

"Um-"

"What Natsu?"

"I-I-I, sort of, might of...burnedthebook-beforeyoucanreadit-because...p-p-please don't k-k-k-kill m-me?"

"Huh?"

"Oh, I see. I guess proving myself really doesn't matter now. Sorry, Lu-chan, you'll find out later~!"

"W-wait! What the heck are you guys talking about?"

"Come on Happy, let's go find a mission!"

"Happy?"

"Aye sir!"

_Natsu and Happy left to the board, leaving Lucy, Erza, Levy and a recovered MiraJane alone._

"Levy?"

"Lucy, um, I'm going to go see what mission Gajeel picked, I promised I go with him."

_Levy quickly hightailed out of there, grabbing Erza's hand in the process...leaving Lucy alone with MiraJane. Master, Marco, Wakaba, a drunk-ish Cana and some-other guild-mates complaining "how unfair it was for them", "what about the bets" and "I probably won; no you didn't bastard!"..._

"Mira, can you tell me?"

_A large smile was placed on MiraJane's face._

"Lucy, I call dibs on being Godmother to your child."

.

.

.

"I see. Seeing I'm the only normal acting person left here, I'm going home and crawl back to bed. Bye, Mira!"

_Lucy rushes past Natsu and Happy and doesn't stop for anything on the way home._

_._

_._

_._

"Happy, was that Lucy?"

"Aye."

"Wonder what's her rush?"

_Ah, what was I saying at the beginning?_

_Oh, just something about your average day at Fairy Tail._

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**ROSESANDRAVENS** (August 22, 2014)


End file.
